It's OK to be burned out by cooking so much -- here's how to feel better

Once you've settled on a meal routine, don't start negotiating with the kids over what to eat.

(CNN)It has been a long two years in the kitchen. Whether you were an enthusiastic home cook or a reluctant one, the pandemic has made everyone burned out by the act of cooking. It's also made us realize how much work it is to cook every meal every day.

It's time to stop being so tough on ourselves and setting unrealistic expectations for what comes out of our kitchens, according to Leanne Brown, author of "Good Enough: A Cookbook."
Cookbook author Leanne Brown suggests a meal routine to streamline time spent in the kitchen.
"We find ways to criticize ourselves when we're already having a hard time," Brown said. Home cooking is not "anything like a restaurant chef or a person on Instagram trying to create content so that the algorithm will notice them." Unless your family is paying you for the act of making them food, the pressure doesn't need to be so great.
    Instead of beating ourselves up over what we think a "good cook" should be, Brown encourages us to think of what is "good enough" instead and reframe our approach to the process (and yes, the work) of cooking with a few mental shifts and tactics.
      Here are Brown's strategies for making the daily job of feeding yourself easier.

        Acknowledge that cooking is about more than cooking

        "We think of cooking as being in the kitchen, chopping the stuff, making the thing," Brown said. "But you can't be in there unless you've done all these other things" -- such as deciding what to eat, buying ingredients and making sure the kitchen is stocked with the right tools.
          "Feeding ourselves is an undervalued skill," she said. "We undervalue it in the capitalist world and in our homes and expectations about it."
          While there's no simple fix to streamline the multipronged act of cooking, Brown emphasizes acknowledging the work and the mental load that comes with every meal. "If you feel weighed down by the general sense that there is too much to deal with when you enter the kitchen, know this: You are not alone," she said.
          Brown's "Good Enough: A Cookbook" promotes self-care in the kitchen.
          There will always be a trade-off of time and labor versus money in fixing the pain points that come with the act of cooking, and budgets don't always allow for grocery delivery, purchasing pre-chopped or partially prepped meals or meal kits.
          The work begins with identifying the points "where you can get stuck," as Brown notes -- "the dishes and the grocery shopping and fridge management." Make small changes in those areas.
          "Ask for help, make it fair, establish some good routines and do what works best for you," she said.

          If meal planning doesn't work, try a meal routine

          With all the steps that go into the act of cooking and providing food, it's easy to get weighed down by decision fatigue. If you've found you can't stick with meal planning, Brown suggests a simpler approach: a meal routine.
          The idea of a meal routine is highly adaptable. You can pick two or three dishes to rotate through over the course of the week, whether that's switching between smoothies and overnight oats at breakfast or going back and forth between chicken salad, hummus and Brown's Cauliflower-Cheese Pita Sandwich for bagged lunches. You can also choose a specific day of the week to eat a specific meal, such as taco Tuesdays or chicken soup Sundays.
          Brown's Cauliflower-Cheese Pita Sandwich makes a filling addition to your routine lunch plan.
          "It's all about finding the meal plan strategy that works for you," Brown said. "Routinize the parts that are more cumbersome to you."
          Brown is admittedly not a morning person, so she sticks to simple breakfast foods and leaves the brainpower for making more complex meals later in the day.
          Make the routine "a thing that you can look forward to, like having a clean out the fridge pizza night or omelet night." Bonus: When the meal routine is set, there's no negotiating with kids over what to eat.

          Fight unrealistic expectations with 'assembly only' meals

          Another way decision fatigue can rear its ugly head is in the perception that every meal has to accomplish multiple things. The food must be delicious, healthy, easy, quick and ready on time to meet multiple family members' schedules but also give us time to connect over the meal -- sound familiar?
          Decision fatigue drains you of your energy to make thoughtful choices. Here's how to get it back