President Donald Trump jetted to Cincinnati on Monday afternoon to tout the gains already being realized as a result of the tax law that Congress passed – and he signed – at the end of 2017.
And, he did that – sort of. In classic Trump fashion, his speech featured a series of impromptu riffs on everything from Democrats not standing to applaud during State of the Union to the Super Bowl to the Nunes memo to his love for equipment.
I combed through the transcript and pulled out the most quotable lines. They’re below.
1. “And we’re starting to boom, you know that.”
Now that is how you start a speech!
2. “And everyone has fallen in love with it.”
People don’t just like the tax cuts. They have actively fallen in love with them. They may marry the tax cuts.
3. “I’ll tell you, Rob Portman, he knows his stuff.”
He does! Rob Portman is a smart dude! But, I cite this Portman reference because it’s the first of roughly 1,000 times that Trump calls to Portman during the speech. It got to the point of being slightly weird. Right, Rob?
4. “I love equipment.”
5. “I love workers.
6. “I was a young success.”
That’s the best kind of success. Way better than old success.
7. “We love manufacturing. Those are real jobs, not the other kind where they talk but there’s nothing there.”
Wait, what are these other jobs Trump is talking about? And can I have one? They seem easy!
8. “We’re bringing back those four magnificent words: ‘Made in the USA.’”
That’s not four words.
9. “We’ll count ‘USA’ as one word. Is that okay? I just said – have to think about that one.”
Alright. I’ll allow it. Just this once.
10. “Remember two things. Number one, I said, we’re going to be saying Christmas again. And, number two, I said I was going to give you a Christmas present.”
It’s February 6.
11. “And then I heard one of the hating groups on television: ‘He promised a Christmas present.’”
Revealing. In Trump’s world, all opposition to him and his policies equal “hating.” There are only two types of people in his world: People who love him and people who (unfairly) hate him.
12. “Otherwise I would have been hearing – Rob –”
Amirite, Rob? You know what I am saying.
13. “She would press us. Right, Rob? She would press us.”
Good ol’ Rob. He remembers how Ivanka demanded a child tax credit be included in the tax bill.
14. “I would have been happy with the $350 million, but you know, I like this number slightly better.”
$350 billion > $350 million
15. “I’ve been – either you renegotiate or you terminate.”
“You terminate” is such a Trumpism. Believe me.
16. “I mean, you haven’t heard that in – how many years would you say, Rob?”