Story highlights
Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt have been married for two years but a couple since 2005
Peggy Drexler: We like to believe marriages fail because of some wrongdoing, not just irreconcilable differences
Editor’s Note: Peggy Drexler is the author of “Our Fathers, Ourselves: Daughters, Fathers, and the Changing American Family” and “Raising Boys Without Men.” She is an assistant professor of psychology at Weill Medical College of Cornell University and a former gender scholar at Stanford University. The opinions expressed in this commentary are solely those of the author.
(CNN) —
Can we possible expect Trump to do the same?
Jeremy Freeman
Peggy Drexler
The trouble with that question, though, is that it completely overlooks the reality of most marriages.
Rumors of the Hollywood couple’s impending split had actually been circulating for months, with tabloids fueling the speculation by peddling sensationalized or unsubstantiated rumors such as Hollywood Life reporting as early as March that the pair had been fighting due to issues over Jolie’s alleged “insane jealousy.” In May, Radar Online ran a headline that Pitt was “caught kissing” actress Lizzy Caplan on the set of their latest film, Allied.
And that is, so far, all we officially know. Naturally, though, the media has made numerous attempts to fill in the blanks, speculating that causes for the split could include substance abuse, anger issues, bad parenting, and, naturally, other women.
At the heart of all of such reports – which are frequently built on foundations no more solid than mysterious friends or sources “close to” the couple – are a few familiar questions: What went wrong? What’s to blame? And, of course, who is most to blame?
Time and again, this is how we treat the news of other people’s failed marriages – we assign blame in order to support the notion that marriages fail because of some specific wrongdoing (and often specifically because of some temptress), and not just because of irreconcilable differences or simply because two people have grown apart in a natural way.
Most married people know that marriage is hard. So why do we want to infuse every last celebrity breakup with some drama? Why must one party or the other be the jilted one?
Photos: Shocking celebrity splits
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Craig Barritt/Getty Images
Cash Money Records co-founder Birdman and singer Toni Braxton sparked speculation they had ended their relationship after the pair deleted all of their photos on Instagram, were no longer following each other on social media and Braxton wrote of "starting a new chapter" on New Year's day. The pair, who went public with their relationship in 2016, announced their engagement in February 2018.
Photos: Shocking celebrity splits
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Chris Frawley/OWN
Singer and Destiny's Child member Michelle Williams announced in December that she and sports chaplain Chad Johnson had ended their engagement. The couple announced in April that they planned to marry and were the subject of the OWN reality series "Chad loves Michelle" which focused on their intensive pre-marital counseling.
Photos: Shocking celebrity splits
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Greg Mathieson/REX/Shutterstock
Olympic gymnast Mary Lou Retton shared on "Dancing With the Stars" that she and husband Shannon Kelley had quietly divorced in February after 27 years of marriage. The couple are the parents of four daughters.
Photos: Shocking celebrity splits
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Kevin Winter/Getty Images
Angelina Jolie Pitt filed for divorce from husband actor Brad Pitt in September 2016. The couple married in 2014, but had been together almost a decade by then. They are the parents of six children.
Photos: Shocking celebrity splits
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Rachel Murray/Getty Images North America
John Cena and Nikki Bella ended their engagement in April after six years together. The WWE stars had reportedly been set to wed May 5 in Mexico.
Photos: Shocking celebrity splits
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Kevin Mazur/Getty Images for One Love Manchester
Rapper Mac Miller and singer Ariana Grande dated for almost two years. In May Grande posted a story on Instagram which appeared to confirm reports the couple had split.
Photos: Shocking celebrity splits
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Kevin Kane/Getty Images For The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame
Ric Ocasek of the Cars and Paulina Porizkova attend the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame induction ceremony in Cleveland in April 2018. A few weeks later Porizkova announced on Instagram that the couple have been separated for a year.
Photos: Shocking celebrity splits
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Kevin Winter/Getty Images North America/Getty Images
Channing Tatum and Jenna Dewan Tatum announced they are separating after nine years of marriage.
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Jason Merritt/Getty Images/File
The pair announced their separation in a joint statement in February. They married in 2015.
Photos: Shocking celebrity splits
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Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty Images
In February comic Sarah Silverman tweeted that she and "Masters of Sex" star Michael Sheen broke up after four years. She chalked it up to their long distance relationship.
Photos: Shocking celebrity splits
