Patriotism! Puffy coats! 60 years of U.S. Olympics uniforms

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This year's Ralph Lauren designs have been mocked

Previous years' Team USA uniforms weren't all sartorial gems either

CNN  — 

For the lazy, unathletic masses, sitting on the couch and judging the Opening Ceremonies is the closest we Americans will ever get to actually competing in the Olympics.

The Games are a time to truly come together as a nation, to look upon our finest athletes and to say together as one:

“Ew. What are they wearing?”

This hallowed tradition will no doubt continue Friday, thanks to the 2016 Olympic uniform designs by preppy standard-bearer Ralph Lauren. The uniforms display some of the classic hallmarks of Olympics past: Clean white bottoms, navy blazers, a combination of red, white and blue … and a secret homage to the Russian flag.

Oh.

Design flaws aside, it was far from the most offensive or even the most talked-about round of Olympic regalia.

Quiz: What kind of Olympian are you?

Click through the gallery above for a poly blend trip back in time through cowboy hats, oversized coats, slap-chopped American flag motifs and TRACK SUITS.