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Queen of the one-liners: Late comic Phyllis Diller's funniest gags

Updated 11:46 AM ET, Tue August 21, 2012
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Phyllis Diller, who died this week, made an artform out of wisecracking. She was prolific, self-deprecating and slyly radical: Her jokes tended to focus on her failings as a housewife, her lack of sex appeal, and the shortcomings of an imaginary husband and overweight mother-in-law. Getty Images
Phyllis Diller on housework: "The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron." Getty Images
On sex: "I admit, I have a tremendous sex drive. My boyfriend lives forty miles away." Getty Images
On her looks: "I was so ugly. I don't know how to tell ya: I wore a choke chain until I was 12. My own ouija board told me to go to hell. A peeping tom threw up on my window sill." Getty Images
On New Yorkers: "Any time three New Yorkers get into a cab without an argument, a bank has just been robbed." Getty Images
On kids: "We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up." Getty Images
On old age: "You know you're old if they have discontinued your blood type. Someone compliments you on your alligator shoes, and you're barefoot." Getty Images
On old age: "Old age is when the liver spots show through your gloves." Getty Images
On providing for your kids: "I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them." Getty Images