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Thursday, March 15, 2007
American Voices: Walter Reed head fired
Army Secretary Francis J. Harvey has resigned after an investigation found systemic outpatient care deficiencies at Walter Reed Army Medical Center. What do you think?

"Now that they've gotten rid of their scapegoat I'm sure that everything will start getting better."
- Irv Mendlesohn, Contractor


"Well, it's good to see a rebuilding effort happening in at least one place where the military is."
- Erin Braylor, Barista


"This whole support-the-troops mentality is really catching on among the top brass.”
- Terry Barnes, Physical therapist


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Wednesday, March 14, 2007
News in Brief: Heavily Processed food makes pathetic nutritional claims
CHATTANOOGA, Tennessee -- In a move that industry observers are already calling desperate, McKee Foods today unveiled new packaging for Little Debbie Zebra Cakes that attempts to emphasize the snack's feeble nutritional value.

"When people think about getting five percent of their niacin intake, we want them to think of Zebra Cakes," said spokeswoman Celeste Freid, who showed an early prototype of the new design's bright bold claims that Zebra Cakes offer "some vitamin C" and contain "almost one percent of your recommended thiamin mononitrate." "People will know just by looking at the box that every 200 Zebra Cakes fulfills their daily fiber requirements."

Though consumer Max Swindel, of Westport, MA, claimed the new approach is a "waste of money," he did concede the snack's original claims of "Delicious!" "Yummy!" and "Scrumptious!" were dangerous understatements.
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
In danger of falling


First time I-Report cartoonist Bryan Youmans offers this drawing. Youmans says "The fact that most of the oil supplying nations are not really our friends or allies leaves us vulnerable. Our strength is attached to our access to oil. The world dynamics are shifting and the possibility of those oil-rich countries uniting and denying us oil leaves us in a precarious position."

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Monday, March 12, 2007
American Voices: Caffeinated donut invented
Molecular biologist Robert Bohannon has created pastries with the caffeine equivalent of two cups of coffee. What do you think?

"Wouldn't it be easier to just make coffee-soluble doughnuts?"
- Doug Thewlis, Systems Analyst


"That's fine for people who like to be alert and productive, but what about the rest of us?"
- Brittain Mosby, Pastor


"Will America embrace this new product? Only time will—oh, yes, it appears they will."
- Kevin March, Nanny


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