Friday, March 02, 2007
Incestuous Love


Patrick and Susan are fighting to change the law

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Patrick is looking at me, clenching his fist, his body shaking, he’s saying nothing. Susan isn’t saying anything either and neither am I. Silence can be so agonizing and there’s so much tension in the air you could almost cut it with a knife. There we are just staring at each other.

It was a difficult interview for a story that couldn’t be more controversial.

Patrick and Susan are a couple and have four children. They are also brother and sister and that makes their relationship illegal under German law. Patrick and Susan didn’t even know of each other’s existence until Patrick was over 20 years old and Susan was in her teens. After their mother died, they lived together and eventually fell in love.

“We just want to lead a normal life,” Patrick tells me, when he finally does manage to speak during the interview. He and Susan appear to be afraid of the camera. I can’t blame them. We’ve come into their home, are shining powerful lights in their faces and asking them to put their whole lives out in the open for us. Lives that have been as tough as anyone could imagine.

“People harass us all the time and call us the incest couple. They have no idea who we really are or how it all happened,” Patrick says, and then he goes on to speak about the legal ordeal he’s been put through. He’s been to jail because of the relationship with his sister; and three of their four children have been taken away from them by German Youth Welfare Services. Now Patrick wants to take the struggle to get the relationship legalized to the highest German court.

Many other European countries lifted bans on incestuous love long ago, and there are interesting arguments on both sides of the equation. Those who feel the ban should be kept in place say incestuous relationships are far more likely to bring forth children with birth defects than relationships between people that are not siblings. But opponents of the ban say it is a violation of couple’s rights to sexual freedom.

Patrick and Susan don’t care about all the politics, they say.

“We really love each other a lot, and we never want to be without each other again. We’re living like a small happy family,” Patrick says. To them, in the end, that’s what it comes down to: He needs her, and she needs him…nothing more.

If Germany’s highest court decides not to take the case, Patrick will go to jail again.

Click here to watch my report

From Frederik Pleitgen, CNN Berlin
Correspondent

Tuesday, February 27, 2007
Dating show for the disabled
We knew this was a sensitive topic when we drove out to the Netherlands from Germany. A dating show for disabled people had never been done before and the question is, whether the people that actually go on such a show are being exploited for the audience’s amusement and the producer’s profit?

Our crew certainly had very mixed feelings doing a story about the show.

In the town of Nijmegen, we met Peter Kunnen who is one of the contestants on the show called “Love at Second Sight.” Peter can only limp with a crutch since he had a car accident 17 years ago. He says he has trouble finding a girl, because they only judge him by his looks when he meets them and many think he’s a freak just because he limps.

Lydia van Dam was the second contestant we met. She has a severe birth defect and has been in a wheelchair since birth. I asked her why she would put herself in the public by displaying her disabilities on TV. She put it simply: “I am physically disabled, I am not mentally disabled. I know exactly what I’m getting into.”

That hit the spot. Maybe the public shouldn’t be so worried about offending disabled people. Maybe that’s a form of pity that’s unfair to them, and which they don’t need, we were thinking.

Peter says he can’t understand all the fuss about the show. He says it’s only people without disabilities that are appalled by the program, disabled people are not. Bluntly Peter added, what disabled people really need is less pity and more respect.

Peter is a professional DJ, and he teaches media classes at Dutch schools. Lydia is a computer whiz. Both them have are managing their lives on their own overcoming the hurdles that stand in their way every day.

In the end the disabled dating show seemed a lot less controversial to us than we would have imagined at the beginning of our research.

You can click here to watch the report.

-- From Frederik Pleitgen, CNN Berlin Correspondent
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