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January 8, 1996
Web posted at: 8:45 p.m. EST
From Reporter Monica Santiago
NASHVILLE, Tennessee (CNN) -- It began almost three years ago in a youth group meeting at Tulip Grove Baptist Church in Nashville, Tennessee. It has since spread like wildfire. "We never knew that it would go as far as it's gone," says member Melissa Ulmer, 15.
She's talking about True Love Waits, a program designed to challenge teen-agers and college students to remain sexually abstinent until marriage. "I don't want to have to worry about getting pregnant, having some kind of disease," Ulmer says. "It's just too much to worry about when you're in high school." (77K AIFF sound or 77K WAV sound)
Fifteen-year-old Brent Scoggins also took up the challenge. "When I first made the pledge in junior high, a lot of the kids were like, 'I don't see why you're doing that, you're a nerd' ... but if that's being a nerd, I don't mind it," said Scoggins. (119K AIFF sound or 119K WAV sound)
Many teen-agers thought they were alone in feeling like Scoggins and Ulmer. But tens of thousands of young people from around the world have signed cards pledging to remain sexually pure until their wedding night.
Although True Love Waits is a religiously oriented campaign, not everyone who pledges belongs to a church. Many teens said they had already made the decision to be abstinent in their hearts, and the pledge was just a way to make it public. "I think it made us feel proud," says Lucy Gama, 19. "I thought it was great."
Lucy's sister Carmen also made the pledge. "A lot of people come up to me and tell me that they respect me more," she says.
But many teens realize it may be hard to keep their promises. "I know it's probably going to get a lot tougher when I get to college, and the pressures are going to that much greater from high school, but I believe I will uphold the decision that I've made just because it's so instilled in me and it's the way that I am," says Kenny Clayton, 17.
The movement grew out of a need, Ross says. "Teen-agers were beginning to assume adults had given up on them ... You drive up in front of a school and you just throw condoms in the door; even though the motivation for that was wonderful, the message that teen-agers were getting was the adults don't think we can control ourselves."
"When I first made the pledge in junior high, a lot of the kids were like, 'I don't see why you're doing that, you're a nerd' ... but if that's being a nerd, I don't mind it."
-- Brent Scoggins
The teen-agers who make the commitment have many different motivations. Some of them have learned from the mistakes of friends who had sex and later regretted it.
"The only thing that has come out of it for them is problems," says Carmen Gama. "They feel like they really love somebody and then they go ahead and have sex and then later on they realize that they just were in 'deep like.'"
Melissa Ulmer echoes that sentiment. "Most people I know regret it after it happens because they think that they love the guy and then it ends up that the guy dumps them."
Not all members of the program are virgins, but those who aren't have decided that abstinence is more important to them than sex.
Jeremy Corley, 20, made the True Love Waits pledge in high school. Now, three years later, he's a college sophomore with a sweetheart, and he remains committed. "I think it's harder at first through high school," Corley says. "Once I learned how to deal with it, make that stand, then it became an every day thing and it's been difficult at different times." (170K AIFF sound or 170K WAV sound)
His girlfriend, Christy Wyatt, 19, shares his view. "It's something I've always believed in," she said.
Many teen-agers understand that abstinence prevents disease, and unwanted pregnancy. What remains to be seen is if this campaign catches on enough to make a difference in teen pregnancy rates.
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