A holiday to remember

	ALSO
Home in time for Thanksgiving

By John Towriss
Special to CNN.com

Web posted: November 23, 2001

WASHINGTON (CNN) -- It was about 11a.m. Thursday when my 8-year-old daughter Emma shrieked, "They're here!" And as my sister's family of five from Indiana poured out of their Yukon XL and into our home the festivities officially began. Others soon arrived and the house filled with excited chatter and the smell of pumpkin pie.

Welcome, Dara and Johnny, to the most American of holidays - Thanksgiving. How appropriate.

Holidays have always had extra special significance in the lives of my children. Emma was born on Christmas Eve, exactly one year after a devastating Christmas Eve in which Carole and I had gotten the news of a miscarriage - our first pregnancy. When we adopted Mira, we left the orphanage on Easter Sunday to travel home. And now, with Dara and Johnny's adoption, another holiday has worked its way into our family history.

As I watch Dara and Johnny being passed from one set of loving arms to the next, I'm glowing inside to see such a warm embrace of our new children. They are cuddled, coddled and cooed at with funny faces and silly baby talk. It's not that I ever doubted that they would be, but I'm moved by the knowledge of how important that love and acceptance will be to Dara and Johnny as they grow up. And how important it will be for them to learn someday to give that gift away.

AFTER YOU'RE HOME

Although your children are now at home, are officially adopted, and are now citizens, you are not quite done yet. Sorry, but a few important steps remain! Time is not of the essence for most of them, however, so you can sit back and take a breather.

Apply for a social security number. This involves filling out a simple form and submitting a few documents. You'll need this number to claim your new child on your income taxes.

File port-placement reports. A social worker must visit your home and see how the child is doing in order to make these reports, usually consisting of a few pages and some pictures, that are sent back to the country of birth. In the case of Kazakhstan, these reports are filed after six months, one year, two years and three years. Positive reports help keep international adoption possible.

Although U.S, citizenship is automatic, if you want documentation of it you must file for it. You can either apply for a U.S. passport or request proof of citizenship -- a nifty little certificate with the child's picture on it and a letter from the president welcoming him or her to the country. Both of these applications require a fee. Until then, the child's passport will have a "permanent resident" stamp.

Re-adopt your child in the United States. Although this is merely a rubber stamp formality, it is an important step. It requires no home study or large fees and can usually be done without an attorney. Simply gather all your documents and submit them to the county court with a court fee (in our case, $90). Readopting allows you to easily get copies of your child's birth certificate in English. Before we readopted Mira, we had only one copy of her birth and adoption certificates, with no real ability to get more, and they were all in Russian. Such documents are not very useful when you try to register your child for school!

Register your child with the embassy of the native country. Kazakhstan requires us to register our children with the embassy within 30 days. Other countries may have different requirements, but they should be minimal. Failing to register with the embassy cannot void your adoption. But not following through with this procedure may make it difficult, if not impossible, for others to adopt from that country.

When we gather around our table for a Thanksgiving prayer something spontaneous occurs. It's not usually our custom to hold hands when we pray but I notice that the children begin to grab each other's hands. Then one takes an adult's hand and then another. In seconds, our hearts and our hands are joined in moving symbolism. We give thanks for the food and the hands that prepared it. We give thanks for our families and our many blessings. We pray for those in our family in need, such as my uncle, who is in a serious bout with cancer. And, of course, we thank God for bringing Dara and Johnny safely into our home from far away lands. It will be the most wonderful of Thanksgiving meals -- full of stories, laughter and fun.

And, for me, there will be one last surprise.

The stimulation overload knocked out Dara and Johnny early in the evening and they are sleeping peacefully in their new cribs. The house is winding down from the unbridled noise and chaos of earlier. My other adopted daughter, little Mira, comes up and jumps into my arms. As she rattles on and on about her day -- talking about her cousins and the little events in her life -- she has my sister and I smiling and laughing. She tells me how much she missed me and peppers me with "big, big" kisses and squeezes me with "big, big" hugs. As she brings me the umpteenth round of joy and laughter that she has presented me in her short life, it is hard to believe that only three years ago I didn't even know she existed and that a year before that I was not even open to accepting her. And that thought brings it all into focus for me.

A wise friend once told Carole and I that the act of adoption is a redemptive act. I had always assumed it was Carole and I who were redeeming the lives of these small ones by giving them a second chance, changing their outlook on life, and bringing love to their hearts. But in the sudden clarity of this moment with Mira and my sister, I realize I've had it all wrong.

I am the one who has found redemption. It's in my heart, my mind and in my outlook that have been forever changed.

And with that, this story of my family's adoption journey comes to a close. It is our sincere hope that by opening up our hearts in this most public of ways that we may have brought some clarity to others still considering this road. It has been our pleasure to tell our story.

Lastly, a very special thanks to my father, "Papa John", who stayed with our two daughters while we were away and who, along with my mother (deceased in 1989), has shown me a life-long example of loving and parenting. May I have the wisdom to honor you by passing this gift on to the next generation.

John Towriss has been with CNN for 21 years, a journalist covering stories the world over. He is deputy bureau chief and director of news coverage in CNN's Washington bureau. Towriss can be reached at TOWRISS@aol.com


Emma helps her new sister, Dara, with her first Thanksgiving meal while Johnny (in the background) also gets some assistance.


John's sister, Teresa Williams, holds Dara for the first time.


The growing Towriss family, enjoying Thanksgiving with some of their friends, have much to be thankful for this year.


Family friend Colleen Kasik cuddles Johnny while Carole looks on.