Review: 'Dead Man on Campus' worth a pop quiz
Web posted on: Friday, September 11, 1998 2:49:25 PM
From Reviewer Paul Tatara
(CNN) -- I feel compelled to warn you that "Dead Man on Campus," the latest installment in that most sacred of all genres, the college gross-out comedy, is now playing in our nation's theaters. This is the poetically rendered story of a studious college freshman (Tom Everett Scott) who gets led astray by his over-sexed, party-animal roommate (Mark-Paul Gosselaar).
When the two roommates realize that they're about to flunk out of school for having done no work whatsoever, they hit upon a brilliant scheme. The university they're attending has a little-known rule stating that any student whose roommate commits suicide will be given straight A's for the semester during which the suicide took place. "Hey," they say, "Let's get a suicidal roommate and push him over the brink!"
Wrack your brains
"Dead Man on Campus," as you may have already wagered, is the kind of movie that's no good. This turn of events can be traced to the fact that it's very, very, very bad. So, rather than writing a needless review of what we'll laughingly refer to as "the movie," I've decided to put together a little pop quiz. There's no time limit, so those of you who move your mouth when you read won't be unfairly left behind again.
1. The big shots at MTV Films decided that "Dead Man on Campus" was worth putting into production because:
a. There was film left in one of the cameras after that cockroach movie.
2. Counting story and screenwriting credits, it took four writers to come up with "Dead Man on Campus." This is because:
a. The typewriter was HUGE!!
3. Tom Everett Scott was funny and likable in "That Thing You Do." In "Dead Man on Campus," Tom Everett Scott is:
a. Funny and likable in "That Thing You Do."
4. Mark-Paul Gosselaar is best known for his work on the Saturday morning teen comedy, "Saved by the Bell." Mark-Paul Gosselaar is in "Dead Man on Campus" because:
a. Elizabeth Berkeley knew somebody. Real well.
5. Director Alan Cohn got his start with MTV's pseudo-verite docu-drama-mentary "The Real World." Cohn was selected to direct "Dead Man on Campus" because:
a. Tilting the camera at an angle while everyone argues about the snide roommate's most recent outburst seems a lot like "directing" to people with groovy haircuts.
6. X, Y, and Z get into a car to go see "Dead Man on Campus." They have to travel 17 miles to reach the theater, driving at a speed of 52 miles per hour. If they stop every 2.8 miles to check the air in the tires and X falls out of the back of the car at the 11.4 mile mark, forcing them to back up 4.2 miles to retrieve him, what the hell is wrong with these people?
a. They are going to see "Dead Man on Campus."
Put your name on your paper and pass it to the front of the class. I will accept badly drawn posters for extra credit.
"Dead Man on Campus" contains four-letter words, although four-syllable words are somewhat scarce. There's open recreational drug use, and sexual situations. I'd warn you about laughs if there were any. 96 minutes. Rated R.
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