CNN - Review: 'Godzilla' is Gawd-awful


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Paul Clinton reviews "Godzilla" in "Paul's Pix"

2.9Mb QuickTime movie

Movie review

'Godzilla' is Gawd-awful

Web posted on: Tuesday, May 19, 1998 5:08:30 PM EDT

From Reviewer Paul Clinton

(CNN) -- Ever since its promotional theatrical trailer was released last summer, we have been teased, taunted and tormented with tantalizing glimpses of the 1998 version of "Godzilla." We've also been told over and over again that "size does matter."

The big lizard is finally here. Hopefully, TriStar Studios can now stop taunting us with advertising and start counting its money.

There is no doubt that this lizard will be a cash cow for at least two or three weeks. Then, hopefully, people will realize that the movie's not worth their pocket change -- or maybe when "Armageddon" opens on July 1, the summer movie season's second comet will land right on top of the big guy.

Broderick

Broderick as earnest scientist

As in the original "Godzilla" released in 1956, a nuclear bomb, this one set off by the French, mutates a harmless reptile into a huge lizard that's big, mean, and has a thing for major cities. Instead of Tokyo, this monster's heading for the Big Apple.

The only thing in his way is half the U.S. Army, the Navy and Ferris Bueler, I mean Matthew Broderick. He plays "the worm guy," an earnest scientist who studies the effects of radiation on worms. Naturally, he's also the world's leading expert on giant nuclear lizards. We also have a little inside joke here. Broderick's character's name is Totopoulos, which happens to be the name of the man who designed this version of Godzilla.

Whining right alongside Broderick's character is his estranged girlfriend Audrey, played by Maria Pitillo, who comes across as a curly-haired clone of "Ally McBeal."

Filmmakers Roland Emmerich (director/writer) and Dean Devlin (producer/writer) are great at eye-popping effects and at blowing up national landmarks, but their films are lacking in character development. The main thing that made their mega-hit "Independence Day" work as well as it did was the wise-cracking fighter pilot, played by Will Smith.

There is no such character here. The closest stand-in we get is a mysterious French special agent, played by Jean Reno, who manages to get a few zingers in here and there as he helps Broderick's character track down Godzilla.

Derivative drivel

Pitillo

During the first hour, Godzilla had me right in the middle of his big scaly palm. The audience is continually teased with only glimpses of "Godzilla" as he crosses the world, eventually descends on lower Manhattan, and proceeds uptown smashing billions of dollars' worth of real estate along the way.

But when the film moves from the lizard action into the humdrum lives of the people played by Broderick, Pitillo and Hank Azaria (who plays a news cameraman) the film's forward momentum skids to a stop.

Basically, this whole movie is derivative drivel. Yes, the special effects are spectacular, but there's not an original thought in evidence. Emmerich and Devlin have borrowed whole scenes from "Jaws," "Star Wars," "King Kong" and "Mighty Joe Young." Then when we finally do see a full-frame shot of the lizard, it's a cross between "Jurassic Park"'s raptors and Sigourney Weaver's "Alien." He's a big boy. But oddly generic.

On top of everything, the mayor of New York is named Ebert, as in Roger, and his chief aid is named Gene, as in Siskel. There's even a little thumbs up, thumbs down action at the end. This cheesy turkey is also a bit hammy. Come to think of it, this isn't a movie. It's a delicatessen.

No matter what I, or anyone else, says, this film is going to make gajillions of dollars, and teenage boys from 12 to 60 will be lining up to see this monster mash. But for me, "Godzilla" ranks as a "somebody else pays." Better yet, make someone pay you to see it. I did.

"Godzilla" is rated PG-13 with a total running time of 138 minutes.