- Video shows a bear eating a kayak as a woman pleads with it to stop
- The Internet has come down solidly on the bear's side
(CNN)Hello, I'm Bear. Maybe you've seen me? I'm the one in that video, eating the kayak?
See, I was just out for a nice stroll the other day along beautiful Berg Bay in Alaska -- you know, home -- when all of a sudden this human started screaming at me.
I started to walk over to see what the heck her problem was. That's when she sprayed me in the face with that pepper stuff. Ouch.
Better leave her alone, I thought, so I backed up. Then she started yelling at me again.
I don't know much Human, but I think she was screaming "Get away from the kayak! Get away from the kayak!"
So I went over to the kayak. At least if by "kayak" she meant that big green thing she'd been using to carry herself and her yummy, yummy food.
Then she yelled at me to come back.
Heh. I'd already fallen for that one once.
So I decided to eat the kayak.
"You're breaking it!" she yelled. "You're breaking my kayak! Why are you doing that? Why are you breaking my kayak?"
Um, maybe because you sprayed me in the face? Plus, I'm a bear. We kind of like to break things.
It went on this way for a while. Me rummaging through her kayak, gnawing on things here and there, her screaming. You can see it for yourself if you watch the video. It's been seen about half a million times so far. And I gather that a lot of you humans are on my side.
"Bear, please stop that!" she yelled. "Please stop breaking my things. Oh, please stop breaking my things, bear!"
"It's not even food," she screamed. "It doesn't even taste good! It's just plastic!"
Actually, lady, it's not bad with a little pepper.