Skip to main content

John Oliver's brilliant excuses to help you skip New Year's Eve commitments

By Emma Lacey-Bordeaux, CNN
updated 11:47 PM EST, Mon December 29, 2014
STORY HIGHLIGHTS
  • Oliver offers several excuses you can use
  • "New Year's Eve is like the death of a pet," he says

(CNN) -- That time of year's coming up again.

Fire up the noisemakers, pop champagne, and put on those goofy 2015 glasses. Yes, in one day, New Year's Eve is upon us.

But, if like thousands of others, you're dreading the night and its obligatory accoutrements, take heart. You're not alone.

John Oliver feels your pain.

"New Year's Eve is the worst," the comedian said in a web only mini installment of his show 'Last Week Tonight with John Oliver.'

"New Year's Eve is like the death of a pet: You know it's going to happen, but somehow, you're never really prepared for how truly awful it is," he said.

Why's it so bad?

According to Oliver: "Forced interaction with strangers, being drunk cold and tired, and having to stare at Ryan Seacrest for five solid minutes waiting for him to tell you what the time is."

But this year, Oliver's got your backs.

In the video, he offers you several excuses to get you out of New Year's Eve commitments.

Say a friend invites you to a party at his house.

"Do you really want to sit on your friend's sofa and watch hummus turn brown all night?
You don't. What to do?

"Simply tell them you're doing a cleanse." Oliver suggests. "The beauty is, there will be no followup questions, because nobody wants to hear about your [expletive] cleanse. So you're out."

ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT