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Oh, mama! Remember: This day is about your daughter
Support the happy couple, but don't try to stand out too much
That means no flirting with the staff and going easy on the booze
Respect the bride's wishes and don't try to change any details
Sandy Malone, star of TLC’s “Wedding Island,” is the owner of Weddings in Vieques, a destination-wedding planning company off the coast of Puerto Rico. Here, the pro-planner is dishing some of her expert advice for free.
The topic? Her top 10 don’ts for mothers of the bride.
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1. Never be late. We’ve had the MOB show up after the welcome party ended (and she was staying at the venue where the party was held). Worse, another MOB was so far behind schedule on the wedding day that she caused the bride to go down the aisle 45 minutes late. That means the bride lost a chunk of her reception party time.
2. Don’t try to steal the show or the photographer. Stay off the center of the dance floor after too many cocktails, and don’t take the photogs away from shooting the wedding for your own personal picture requests. It’s not your day.
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3. If you didn’t help plan the wedding, don’t try to change any details on the big day. The planners are following a strict schedule and décor plan that the bride pre-approved.
4. Don’t get drunk at the wedding events. It’s fine to celebrate, but remember that everybody has video on their cameras now.
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5. Don’t wear white, ivory or champagne – or any other color you wouldn’t have wanted your own mother to wear on your wedding day.
6. Don’t try to match the bridesmaids or the wedding party unless your daughter has specifically requested it. You’re not a member of the bridal party, you’re the mother of the bride and you should stand out as such, in an appropriate dress.
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7. Don’t flirt with the staff. More than one inebriated MOB has glued herself to my husband or another unfortunate male staff member at weddings I’ve planned. We’re working and you’re embarrassing the bride.
8. Never forget that you’re a parent, not “one of the kids.” Behave like an adult and resist the urge to plunge into the swimming pool when the drunk 20-somethings make the splash.
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9. Regardless of how you feel about your daughter’s new spouse, do not express displeasure with that person or their family during the wedding weekend. You never know who can hear what you’re saying, so be careful if you are complaining to friends or the wedding planner. There are other guests all around you who may repeat what they overhear you say.
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10. Never refer to your daughter’s big day as “our” wedding. It’s not your wedding – the day belongs solely to your daughter and her soon-to-be spouse. If you keep this one in mind, it might help you avoid the first nine things “thou shalt not do” at her wedding.
Consider this a safe place to dish on parents’ bad behavior at your wedding. We’re here for you in the comments below, on Twitter @CNNLiving or on CNN Living’s Facebook page!