Skip to main content
Part of complete coverage from

Don't name your kid Siri

By Dean Obeidallah, Special to CNN
updated 12:02 AM EST, Sun December 2, 2012
Sometimes a highly individualistic name for a baby is not good news for a kid, says Dean Obeidallah
Sometimes a highly individualistic name for a baby is not good news for a kid, says Dean Obeidallah
STORY HIGHLIGHTS
  • Dean Obeidallah: A new list of popular 2012 baby names includes Siri, Mac, Luna
  • He says it's not just celebrities with offbeat baby-naming now; it's spreading to the rest of us
  • He says studies show distinctive names can spur teasing and mistreatment
  • Obeidallah: Parents, think twice on names; it could have long-term effect on your child

Editor's note: Dean Obeidallah, a former attorney, is a political comedian and frequent commentator on various TV networks including CNN. He is the editor of the politics blog "The Dean's Report" and co-director of the upcoming documentary "The Muslims Are Coming!" Follow him on Twitter: @deanofcomedy

(CNN) -- Siri, Mars, Mac and Luna. I'm not talking Apple products or planetary terms. These are baby names. And not just any baby names but ones that have jumped in popularity in 2012, according to Baby Center.com's just released list.

Baby Siri? Seriously, who would name their bundle of joy after a frustrating Apple product that hardly ever works? And speaking of Apple (see daughter of Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin,) that name moved up a whopping 585 places on the list of names for girls born in 2012. So there could conceivably be a family out there with a daughter named Apple and a son named Siri. (Hope that entitles the family to a discount on an iMac.)

There was a time when bizarre baby naming was something only celebrities did to their kids (as if being the child of a celebrity wasn't challenging enough). There's Beyonce and Jay Z's Blue Ivy, Penn Jillette's son, Moxie Crimefighter, Bono's daughter Memphis Eve, actor Jason Lee's son Pilot Inspektor, and the list goes on and on.

Dean Obeidallah
Dean Obeidallah

But now this "condition" is apparently spreading to the rest of us. In addition to the offbeat names above, 2011 saw babies sporting such names as: Moo, Draper, Graceland and Tequila.

There are even media reports that this past weekend some parents allegedly named their newborn daughter, Hashtag. That one may turn out to be an Internet hoax, but after last year's story of a child in Egypt being named Facebook (in praise of the role Facebook played in the Egyptian revolution), we can't be too far from babies named Retweet and Spam Blocker anyway. It truly is only a matter of time until you meet a kid named DVR or Playstation 3.

Become a fan of CNNOpinion
Stay up to date on the latest opinion, analysis and conversations through social media. Join us at Facebook/CNNOpinion and follow us @CNNOpinion on Twitter. We welcome your ideas and comments.



Apparently some parents believe that giving their child a jaw-dropping name will make him or her more distinctive. News flash: it's not the name that makes your child stand out, it's his or her achievements.

While I don't want to rain on creativity, let's be honest -- these weird names are more about parents showing off their "cleverness" than about finding a name that fits the child. It's not like the parents got to know the child first for a few months and then said, "You know this baby really is a little Siri."

Beyonce, Jay-Z welcome baby Blue Ivy
Jolie: We are all Malala

And do these parents even consider that a baby's name can cause consequences for the child that the parents never imagined, and in many areas of the child's life? When I reflect upon my own name, I realize that my life could have been far different if my parents had followed their initial instincts when naming me.

My Palestinian father wanted to name me Saladin after the famous Muslim leader, while my Sicilian mother wanted to name me Dino. Instead they compromised on Dean.

Growing up in North Jersey, Dean was not a common name. But it actually made me feel different in a good way being the only Dean in my class. And even today in looking at the list of baby names for 2012, I was actually happy that Dean was not in the top 100.

Still, the truth is, if I'd been named Dino, I would have certainly been viewed as more ethnic by teachers, potential employers and co-workers. I would have been required to continually overcome cultural stereotypes.

And if I'd been named the very Arabic Saladin Obeidallah, you could just imagine all the "fun" I would have had in post-9/11 America. I would have likely volunteered for "random" security checks at the airport to make it easier for all involved or simply got used to taking the bus cross country.

But there's a difference between a name that isn't overly common and naming your child after your favorite appliance. A name is a big part of a kid's identity. It can trigger impressions about a child even before we meet him or her -- a particular problem among the closed-minded of the world, but this is the world your child will have to navigate.

For example, studies have found that children with names that linguistically sound like they come from a lower socioeconomic status are less likely to be recommended by school officials for gifted classes and actually more likely to be labeled as learning disabled.

Other research has revealed that boys with feminine sounding names -- such as Shannon or Ashley -- have had more disciplinary problems in school because of their response to teasing. Still other studies have found a link between how much people like their own names and their level of self-esteem.

So, parents, keep in mind that your choice of name will have a lasting impact on your child -- both for good and bad. And if you insist on picking a bizarre name for the baby, then I propose that your child be empowered to rename you with any name he or she chooses. At least then it's fair that a child named Hashtag has parents named Angry Birds and YouTube.

Follow us on Twitter @CNNOpinion.

Join us on Facebook/CNNOpinion.

The opinions expressed in this commentary are solely those of Dean Obeidallah.

ADVERTISEMENT
Part of complete coverage on
updated 7:35 AM EDT, Wed June 19, 2013
Yury Fedotov says progress has been made but not fast enough to help millions of trafficking victims
updated 10:58 AM EDT, Wed June 19, 2013
Mark Quarterman says the slaughter of elephants for their tusks is at its worst in decades. As the price for ivory soars, Africa's militant groups are killing elephants to pay for arms and ammunition.
updated 7:29 AM EDT, Wed June 19, 2013
Wendy Weiser says the Supreme Court's ruling on Arizona voting restrictions was a win for voters, but why stop there? It's time to modernize the U.S. election system.
updated 7:37 AM EDT, Wed June 19, 2013
George Gascon, a former police chief, says immigrants are less likely to report crimes if they fear police. It's in law enforcement's interest to bring them out of shadows
updated 8:49 AM EDT, Wed June 19, 2013
Peter Bergen says it's up to the public to decide if the terror attacks on U.S. soil prevented by NSA spying are worth giving up privacy.
updated 11:39 AM EDT, Tue June 18, 2013
James Millward says if Chen Guangcheng's departure from NYU owes anything to Chinese pressure, his is but one, high-profile case.
updated 10:46 AM EDT, Tue June 18, 2013
Bruce Schneier says the United States is conducting offensive cyberwar actions around the world.
updated 7:42 AM EDT, Tue June 18, 2013
President Obama will speak in Berlin one week before the 50th anniversary of the famous speech by President Kennedy.
updated 8:36 AM EDT, Tue June 18, 2013
CNN let readers choose the topics for the new Change the List project. The votes are in.
updated 9:49 AM EDT, Tue June 18, 2013
Gloria Borger says the president should be leading the debate on balancing security vs. privacy.
updated 8:55 AM EDT, Tue June 18, 2013
Alex Footman says he and a former co-worker successfully sued a movie studio over their experience as unpaid interns.
updated 6:44 AM EDT, Tue June 18, 2013
Peter Bergen says the public record tends to cast doubt on the NSA's claim that its electronic surveillance has helped stop numerous plot.
updated 7:53 AM EDT, Mon June 17, 2013
Fifty years ago, President Kennedy defined civil rights and equality as a moral issue. Patrick Kennedy says today's moral issue is that people with brain injuries and mental illness face stigma and inadequate treatment.
updated 3:47 PM EDT, Mon June 17, 2013
The story of the boy bashed on social media after singing the National Anthem in mariachi costume is instructive.
updated 10:57 AM EDT, Sun June 16, 2013
Bob Greene says the Lone Ranger rode into town, fought injustice and got out. He didn't stop to tweet that he just saved the day.
updated 12:25 PM EDT, Sun June 16, 2013
Ruben Navarrette says that what many of us really want for Father's Day is an attitude adjustment for our kids.
updated 9:00 AM EDT, Mon June 17, 2013
At the outset of his term, the new president of Iran, Hassan Rouhani, will confront a thicket of national and international challenges.
updated 4:58 PM EDT, Fri June 14, 2013
Clifford Nass says talking to your car, even when you've got your hands on the wheel and eyes on the road, impairs your driving because it really confuses your brain.
updated 2:43 PM EDT, Tue June 18, 2013
Nadia Bilchik writes how she grew up in a cocoon of white privilege in South Africa. But she grew to understand the horror of apartheid and the greatness of Nelson Mandela.
updated 2:54 PM EDT, Wed June 12, 2013
Ronald Deibert says unintended consequences of the NSA scandal will undermine U.S. foreign policy interests.
ADVERTISEMENT