Editor's note: Brenna Ehrlich and Andrea Bartz are the sarcastic brains behind humor blog and book "Stuff Hipsters Hate." Got a question about etiquette in the digital world? Contact them at firstname.lastname@example.org.
(CNN) -- There are a ton of old sayings about music: that it's the food of love, that it soothes the savage beast, that it makes the people come together (yeah). And for good reason: Over the years, music has remained one of the few things, genres notwithstanding, that most people can agree to enjoy.
However, just as genres and sounds have twisted and changed over the years (just watch these elderly folks listening to Skrillex for proof) the way we listen to, consume and integrate music into our daily lives has also shifted and altered.
Now, with the advent of the Web and advances in technology, music can occupy every corner of our mundane existence -- like a particularly pungent cooking odor, but in a good way.
That's why this week, we're going to highlight a passel of helpful music apps that do more than just, well, allow you to listen to music. Instead, they help your mood, your schedule and even your love life.
All of these apps live on Spotify's new app platform, a whole new world of services built by developers within the streaming-music service's desktop client. So stop merely listening to music. It's time to live it, too.
Everything sucks. You twisted your ankle, broke a plate, tripped on the curb, walked past a black cat, smashed a mirror, ripped your pants, had a fight with your boyfriend, contracted an STD (the reason for the aforementioned fight) and lost your job (did we mention your boyfriend was your boss?).
How, oh how, are you to pull yourself up by your bootstraps out of the doldrums and myriad other cliches? Well, it's an oft-bandied-about assertion that smiling makes you happy, so why not find a way to add some twitch to the sides of your lips with Spotify app Moodagent?
When you fire up the app, you can pick from an array of playlist moods -- Sensual, Tender, Happy, Angry -- or search for a song that evokes a certain mood and create a mix of similar tunes.
Oh, and although many kitten posters say laughter is the best medicine, maybe after lightening your mood, you should also hit up your doctor.
When seapunk emerged from the briny depths of the Internet a mere handful of months ago, you felt that that you were finally whole.
You immediately went out and purchased a bottle of blue hair dye and various and sundry jaunty nautically themed vestments from your local Salvation Army and soon thereafter created a Tumblr replete with Little Mermaid/Enya GIFs.
However, although your heart had been recently revivicated by that most viral of electronica currents, it still felt empty -- because you had no one with whom to share your oceanic ardor.
Lucky for you, Spotify has an app for that (sorry, we really need to retire that phrase).
Fellody is a handy dating/friend-making tool on Spotify's platform that scans your library to help you find lovers and friends who share your taste in tunes.
See? There's plenty of fish in the sea(punk).
The other week, an op-ed in The New York Times headlined "The 'Busy' Trap" got the Web buzzing about its assertion that people are so busy nowadays because society forces us to be that way/to stave off the crushing emptiness that inactivity breeds.
No matter which side you take on the issue ("NO! I'm busy because I'm an IMPORTANT cat video-finder!" or "You're right. ... My soul would be black and empty if my schedule was likewise"), we can all agree that we sometimes miss our favorite bands when they come through town due to said busy-ness.
That's where Seatgeek comes in. This Spotify app scans your music library to provide you with a handy timeline of bands coming through your hood, along with links to the best ticket prices.
So give it a download and fill your heart void with live music instead of overtime.