Your emergency mood kit

(Oprah.com) -- Everyone experiences mood variations -- while you may feel cheerful and optimistic most of the time, you might occasionally feel grumpy, anxious, or dejected.

Such fluctuating mood states are both inevitable and, to some degree, controllable*.

One thing that won't rescue your mood is simply putting on a happy face, trying to will yourself into constant cheerfulness. In fact, you may drive your darker feelings underground, reemerging later as temper tantrums, depression, or stress-related illness.

Changing your own mood requires methods that gently refocus your attention in ways that genuinely improve your inner life, not just slap behavioral Band-Aids over your pain or frustration. Try being fully present in every moment of experience. Look around you right now at all the things that are supporting your well-being: the chair you're sitting in, the sunlight, the electric lines that help make your life more manageable, the clothes you're wearing.

Once you've anchored yourself in the present, try one or more of the following practices to nudge your brain activity into the zone where your mood is cheerful, calm, and appreciative.

Lift your spirits with these 10 mood menders!

Visualize the inside of your head as a round room lined with many large toy chests. In each box, you store memories of different things. Imagine a shiny new empty box, and picture yourself writing the word "Favorites" on it. Now, search your memory for the most beautiful memories you possess -- a celebration with friends, your daughter's birth, falling in love. Picture each situation vividly, and then imagine yourself putting it in the "Favorites" box. Go to a new memory and repeat the process.

Spend time each day going to the box, "opening" it, recalling the times you've stored there, and adding new favorites.

List five things you love with each of your senses. Start by writing five endings to the sentence, "I love the smell of& " Then go on to "I love the sound of& " "I love the sight of& " "I love the feel of& " "I love the taste of& " and "I love the sight of." See how your mood improves as you simply list these 25 things.

Think of 20 things for which you are grateful, and name them out loud. Then name 20 more. Never repeat yourself. Can't do it? You're not trying very hard. For example, try giving thanks for the ability to breathe, air conditioning, Beethoven, grapes, and TiVo. Not grateful for those things? Come up with your own. You'll find the mood-lifting list is literally endless.

Keep a stack of items in your home or workplace that make you laugh. A terrific cartoon may do it, or a picture of your pet turtle in a hat, a DVD of standup comedy, or the phone number of your funniest friend. When you're feeling low, spend 10 minutes with your laughter-launchers, until you can at least crack a smile. Your physical and mental health will both benefit.

Share comforting touch with another living being. Ask for a hug from a loved one. Get a massage, pedicure, or haircut. Pet your cat, stroke the nose of a horse, rub your dog's belly. Physical touch is such a powerful psychological need that infants who don't get enough may actually die.

Help someone. A sense of powerlessness is a major component of depression and anger, and it's reinforced by the illusion that power is being able to command others to help you. The truth is that the person being helped generally feels less powerful, while the helper gets a boost of self-esteem. Volunteer for a good cause, join a political march you believe in, take flowers to a sick friend -- the world is full of people needing help, and any of them might be your path to serenity.

Be your own nurturing parent. Sometimes, when life gets tough and things are hard, putting on a happy face is worse than letting yourself be upset. At those times, look within you for the voice of the nurturing parent, the kind, friendly guide who says, "Go ahead and feel your feelings; it isn't the end of the world." Give yourself a hot bath, a good meal, and a nap. Treat yourself as you would a grieving child who'd been placed in your care.

Rest. Americans are chronically overworked and sleep-deprived, conditions that lead to adrenal burnout, exhaustion, and bad moods of all kinds. The next time you're feeling cranky or morose, check in with your body. How tired are you? Do lying down, attending a yoga class, or reading quietly for a few minutes sound enticing? Go for it. You'll work more effectively, and feel better, for the rest of the day.

Consult your favorite "tribal elders." We're lucky to live in a time when many of the wisest things ever thought, said, or written in any language are available to us, either in print or on the Internet. Keep your favorite quotations from wise people in places where you can see them. Store books that illuminate your spirit next to your bed, where you can reread them often. Spend a few minutes touching base with your own wisdom tradition when your mood needs lifting.

Meditate. Sitting still and observing one's own mind at work, which allows you to separate from your negative emotions without suppressing them, is a powerful mood-elevating technique practiced in many cultures. Scientists have found that the more time Tibetan monks had spent in meditation, the more they developed parts of the brain associated with happiness. Give yourself five minutes, during a stressful time, to simply watch your thoughts and feelings without judgment. It's a subtle but powerful liberation.

*If you experience severe or bad moods, you may have a biochemical imbalance that can and should be treated medically. Since mood disorders are both serious and very treatable, you should do whatever it takes to get good medical care. E-mail to a friend

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Get more advice from Martha Beck. She is the author of "Leaving the Saints," "The Joy Diet," "Finding Your Own North Star" and "Expecting Adam."